I am an aspiring writer..../artist/photographer/moviemaker. I have lofty aspirations. Maybe they're not realistic, but no amount of criticism has been able to deter me yet, which I accredit to my sometimes-not-so-beneficial stubborn streak.
That said, my creative energies have been petering out as of late. I take about a dozen photographs a day (give or take), but the subject matter is not so much artsy as undeniable adorable at every given moment. As for writing, forget about it. I have so much to do during the day, I have no time to cook up scenes, dialogue, or plot. The only storyline I have mapped out 100% is Warriors of Polithia, but when I try to write, the words come out flat, unpolished. My writing buddy and I came to the conclusion that we have reached a stalemate with our beloved stories. Heck, we've been working on them since middle school. There's no excitement to them anymore; no fresh twists or "Eureka!" moments of inspiration.
So we have decided to take a step back from our "babies" and start fresh. Starting the 1st of June, we will write a chapter a month for the next year. The only break will be during November so that we can participate in Nanowrimo (National Novel Writing Month), an event in which we will write an entire novel for the month of November (It's actually not as hard as it sounds). At the end of every month, we will swap printed chapters so that we are not tempted to edit. There is a time and a place for editing: When the manuscript in complete. Editing prior to completion has only resulting in stalling and second-guessing for me so far. With deadlines in place, I know it will be easier to let the words and actions flow. Can you tell I'm excited??
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Friday, May 28, 2010
Getting Into The Swing Of Things
This week was sprinkled with firsts for me. My first time shopping alone with a baby; my first not-rushed dinner/shopping date with a good friend; my first somewhat (or totally) illegal dumping of our collection of recyclables into the Killeen Mall dumpster. Fear not, that last one will be explained. But, more than anything, for the first time I feel like I can really manage on my own again. I thought it would be so difficult to juggle a baby, household chores, and a social life, but, really, all it take is a little fine tuning and a heck of a lot of upper body strength. And, in the case of the illegal dumping, two people and a very fast car.
I'm a rule-follower. I like to think I hold myself to a high personal moral standard. That said, milk cartons, even rinsed, in 90+ degree weather turn into stink bombs of death. We had stopped a couple of places before we were going to head to the Commissary to recycle. When we got back into the car the second time, the stench was unbearable. And, lo, there was the mall, a shiny beacon. Having worked in a mall before, I knew exactly where to go, so we went. I think the funniest part was when "Living La Vida Loca" came on the radio just as we were pulling in, as if we were acting out an action scene in a movie and it was on the soundtrack. I probably won't do it again, though, as it does technically cost the mall money to have the trash taken away....
Is it weird that I see movie scenes/hear soundtracks in everyday acts? No? Good.
Shopping alone wasn't bad. It was slow goings, for sure. When you're rocking an 18 lb. baby on one hip and only have the use of one hand, loading a cart is tedious. But it sort of felt liberating being able to steer a full shopping cart and keep my son happy at the same time. Of course, when the husband gets home, I will not be so keen on the solo trips, if only because I like not looking like a crazy person conferring with a drooling baby about whether or not we need more air freshener.
Next week, one of my friends is having a baby shower. I am so excited to be in a room full of adult women; it's been so long. I'm especially excited to see someone else sporting a cute baby belly. Let's just hope I don't get the baby bug. Though, as young as Alex is, I doubt I'm susceptible.
I'm a rule-follower. I like to think I hold myself to a high personal moral standard. That said, milk cartons, even rinsed, in 90+ degree weather turn into stink bombs of death. We had stopped a couple of places before we were going to head to the Commissary to recycle. When we got back into the car the second time, the stench was unbearable. And, lo, there was the mall, a shiny beacon. Having worked in a mall before, I knew exactly where to go, so we went. I think the funniest part was when "Living La Vida Loca" came on the radio just as we were pulling in, as if we were acting out an action scene in a movie and it was on the soundtrack. I probably won't do it again, though, as it does technically cost the mall money to have the trash taken away....
Is it weird that I see movie scenes/hear soundtracks in everyday acts? No? Good.
Shopping alone wasn't bad. It was slow goings, for sure. When you're rocking an 18 lb. baby on one hip and only have the use of one hand, loading a cart is tedious. But it sort of felt liberating being able to steer a full shopping cart and keep my son happy at the same time. Of course, when the husband gets home, I will not be so keen on the solo trips, if only because I like not looking like a crazy person conferring with a drooling baby about whether or not we need more air freshener.
Next week, one of my friends is having a baby shower. I am so excited to be in a room full of adult women; it's been so long. I'm especially excited to see someone else sporting a cute baby belly. Let's just hope I don't get the baby bug. Though, as young as Alex is, I doubt I'm susceptible.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Little Things To (Start To) Do
1. Carve out some time to exercise. Walk the dogs with the baby; have someone watch the babe for 30 minutes and go for a run; at this point I'll go to the gym with my brothers and have all of us take turns holding the baby! Wait, are babies allowed in the gym? Hmmmm....
2. Work on the new script a little each day. Full page, half page, it doesn't matter. It'll never get done if no writing is happening. And, anyway, if I'm filming at the end of the year I'm on a deadline.
3. Blog more. Not everyday, but more often. It helps me unload enough after a long day/week/month to want to write more, aiding with #2.
4. Print pictures. Or, by the end of the year, I'll have over two thousand prints on my finicky hard drive and no hard copies. Not a good thing.
5. Bite the bullet and buy some new pants. I have accepted the fact that my hips and butt have been transformed as a result of carrying and bearing my child. I will likely never fit into size 4 jeans again, and unlikely to fit into my size 6 anytime soon. Time to kiss my maternity pants good-bye and embrace my new shape. Maybe that gym time will help sweat some of it off, but, for now, Goodwill is getting a lot of my teeny weeny clothing.
6. Play outside more. The lighting is better for photos, and early in the morning or right before nightfall are great temperature-wise. It's good for getting some fresh air and exposing the baby to the fun of the outdoors.
That's a good start.
2. Work on the new script a little each day. Full page, half page, it doesn't matter. It'll never get done if no writing is happening. And, anyway, if I'm filming at the end of the year I'm on a deadline.
3. Blog more. Not everyday, but more often. It helps me unload enough after a long day/week/month to want to write more, aiding with #2.
4. Print pictures. Or, by the end of the year, I'll have over two thousand prints on my finicky hard drive and no hard copies. Not a good thing.
5. Bite the bullet and buy some new pants. I have accepted the fact that my hips and butt have been transformed as a result of carrying and bearing my child. I will likely never fit into size 4 jeans again, and unlikely to fit into my size 6 anytime soon. Time to kiss my maternity pants good-bye and embrace my new shape. Maybe that gym time will help sweat some of it off, but, for now, Goodwill is getting a lot of my teeny weeny clothing.
6. Play outside more. The lighting is better for photos, and early in the morning or right before nightfall are great temperature-wise. It's good for getting some fresh air and exposing the baby to the fun of the outdoors.
That's a good start.
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Ugh, this week....
Today marks two weeks since my husband left for a month (plus a completely useless week) of training. Last week, I was so busy I honestly hardly even noticed that he was gone until it was time for bed. But this week...ugh. Insomnia and exhaustion are battling for dominance, and it's a trifle draining. Mommy's attention is completely consumed during the day and constantly interrupted at night, which means housework has been puttering along. Here's hoping I can actually get it completely clean sometime in the next three weeks so I don't look like I was slacking off the whole time my guy was gone! I try to nap when Alex does, but the last two days he has been skipping naps completely, resulting in an overtired little one who can no longer sleep through the night.
That's right, I said no longer. He did do it, folks. Twice, even! Two blissful nights in a row he slept for eight glorious hours! But then I had to go and tell my mother the good news, and now I am back to the newborn every-two-hours-hungry cycle. I had a feeling I was jinxing myself when I said it. *sigh*
Draining me at an equal velocity is my attempt to re-enroll in college, which involves choosing (and sticking to) a course of study/certification. What I want to do with my life and the practicality of what I should do for my family are brutally at odds. Logically, selecting a certification program that could net me good money in a stable career would be most beneficial to my family, and I could enjoy the work. Ideally, obtaining a Master's in literary or fine arts could usher me into a career that I have the talent and deepest of desires for. People say to do both, and I could, I suppose. But I have a family of my own now. It's young, and it needs to be nurtured, and in a few years it may grow. It's hard to imagine working, going to school, and raising my very young child(ren). For now, I am making sure I have all my core classes knocked out, so I still have a little time to consider my next move.
In baby news, Alex is healthy, happy, and extremely social. He hasn't gained much weight in the past few weeks, but he was already way ahead, and he eats all the time, so I'm not terribly concerned. I mean, 17.5-18 lbs is still in the 95th percentile for a 4-month-old, and he still has two weeks 'til he reaches that milestone. He is a strong kiddo....Stands (with help from mommy), rolls, and even supports his weight on his arms to stay up in a sitting position for a while! I'm so proud of him. By the time his daddy gets home he's going to have an arsenal of new tricks!
That's right, I said no longer. He did do it, folks. Twice, even! Two blissful nights in a row he slept for eight glorious hours! But then I had to go and tell my mother the good news, and now I am back to the newborn every-two-hours-hungry cycle. I had a feeling I was jinxing myself when I said it. *sigh*
Draining me at an equal velocity is my attempt to re-enroll in college, which involves choosing (and sticking to) a course of study/certification. What I want to do with my life and the practicality of what I should do for my family are brutally at odds. Logically, selecting a certification program that could net me good money in a stable career would be most beneficial to my family, and I could enjoy the work. Ideally, obtaining a Master's in literary or fine arts could usher me into a career that I have the talent and deepest of desires for. People say to do both, and I could, I suppose. But I have a family of my own now. It's young, and it needs to be nurtured, and in a few years it may grow. It's hard to imagine working, going to school, and raising my very young child(ren). For now, I am making sure I have all my core classes knocked out, so I still have a little time to consider my next move.
In baby news, Alex is healthy, happy, and extremely social. He hasn't gained much weight in the past few weeks, but he was already way ahead, and he eats all the time, so I'm not terribly concerned. I mean, 17.5-18 lbs is still in the 95th percentile for a 4-month-old, and he still has two weeks 'til he reaches that milestone. He is a strong kiddo....Stands (with help from mommy), rolls, and even supports his weight on his arms to stay up in a sitting position for a while! I'm so proud of him. By the time his daddy gets home he's going to have an arsenal of new tricks!
